Trump: "Foreign Policy? If you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee!"
What is the difference between a lawyer and a liar?
Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Funny Messenger Texts
I have a picture of u, I think its very nice, I put it under my bed... 2 scare away the mice!
The only way to do great work is to love what you do. By Steve Jobs
There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it!
Funny SMS Texts & Messages
What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
More Funny TextsActual writings on hospital charts
Said in court
50 fun things to do in the elevator
Arkansaw drivers license application
Men vs Woman
Bar phrases and translations
Bumper sticker sayings
The perfect employee
The Shit List
Wisdom and questions
22 things not to say to a cop
63 ways to piss off a cop
Make your room mate crazy
Things to say to telemarketeers
Things you wouldn't know without movies
I want my pictures back
The tree stars
Things in football that sound dirty - but aren't
Reasons for making/ not making love
Three little ducks
Whom you should marry
Four catholic woman
Little Johnny and Mom Dad
Water the bushes
Wich one is married
Another dumb blonde
Gravity defying tequila
Blind man and blonde
Reason for asking
Little Johnny and little Margaret
Bill Gates in Hell
Top ten lists
A girls first time
Kiss without touching lips
A helping hand
Unzip the skirt
Funny Jokes:Pass My Shotgun
One Day Three Women Went Camping - A Blonde A Brunette And A Redhead
Two Cowboys Were Sitting In A Bar When One Asked His Friend If He Had Heard Of The New Sex Position Called Rodeo
What Did The 0 Say To The 8
How Does A Blonde Kill A Fish?
What Is Funnier Than A Zombie Baby Hanging From A Ceiling Fan
One Day A Man Asked A Blonde Which Is Closer The Moon Or Florida
You Might Be A Redneck If You Think Fly
A Small Frog Goes To A Fortune Teller And Asks If He Is Gonna Meet A Young Girl
Children In The Back Of The Car Cause Accidents
Yo Mamma So Hairy That She
Your Mums So Old
Shannon Is So Lose She Could Be A Wide Reciver
My Stomach Is Getting Awfully Big Doctor
There was absolute chaos on Capitol Hill this morning
Why Did The Blonde Sell Her Television
One Day A Redneck Farmer Goes To Farmers Market
Yo Mama So Fat When She Jumps
Tarzan Had Been Living Alone In His Jungle Kingdom For 30 Years With Only Apes For Company
There Were 3 People There Names Where Shutup Manners Poop
Blonde Been Fired From A Banana Plantation After
Top Funny Jokes:
One-Liner Top 5:
The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
The value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don't know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about.
Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.
Even if you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid!
Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!